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Prescription Drugs and How to Save Your Sex Life

aking certain prescription drugs can either enhance your experience or make it a dud. If you are experiencing back issue and taking pain medication and muscle relaxers you may just be causing your own erectile problem. If you are taking antidepressants you may be having ED. So you counter it with an enhancement drugs and for a while that makes it all worth the effort. If your meds are taking are not really necessary and you are using them recreational then STOP. Let your libido recover and use the ED drugs and have a great interaction and pleasure your girl.

Article is an excerpt and reprint from www.mercola.com
The following is a list of commonly used prescription drugs that can have a negative effect on your Libido.
By Dr. Mercola

It’s estimated that 30-40 percent of people around the globe experience a lack of interest in sex for at least several months in any given year. The reasons for low libido are complex and run the gamut from stress and other emotional difficulties to physical problems, including erectile dysfunction.

Most people do not seek help for chronic low libido, which is unfortunate because regular sex with a committed partner cannot be underestimated as a factor for reducing stress, bolstering self-esteem, and fostering feelings of intimacy and bonding between partners.

A healthy sex life can provide for a longer, healthier and, most would agree, more enjoyable life, but many are missing out on this very primal pleasure.

Oftentimes low libido is related to your lifestyle, and that includes any medications you are taking. Many medications can interfere with your sex drive, including the 10 that follow. Considering the widespread use of many of these, it’s likely that medication use is a leading cause of low libido among both men and women.

If you’re taking one of these and have experienced a drop in your libido, talk with a natural health care practitioner about drug-free alternatives. Many of the drugs below are used for conditions that are better treated using non-drug methods.

1. Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) Antidepressants

Sexual dysfunction is a frequent side effect of antidepressants, including the SSRIs (Prozac, Zoloft, etc.) that are often used as a first-line treatment option for depression. According to a report in the Journal of Psychiatry & Neuroscience:

“Sexual dysfunction occurs through several brain pathways involving increases in serotonin (5-HT), decreases in dopamine (DA) and inhibition of nitric oxide synthase. Increases in cortico-limbic 5-HT result in decreased sexual desire, ejaculation and orgasm.

Consequently, it is not surprising that selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI)-induced sexual dysfunction occurs in 30%–80% of patients and is a main cause of treatment discontinuation.”

2. Tricyclic Antidepressants

Tricyclic antidepressants are much less widely used than the newer SSRIs, but they are still prescribed for both depression and nerve pain. Like SSRIs, tricyclic antidepressants are also associated with decreased libido.

3. Proscar

Proscar belongs to a class of drugs called 5-alpha-reductase inhibitors, which are used to treat enlarged prostate. Your prostate gland contains an enzyme called 5-alpha reductase, which converts the male hormone testosterone to another androgen called dihydrotestosterone (DHT). This class of drugs inhibits 5-alpha-reductase, thereby blocking the conversion of testosterone DHT.

As a result, they may help to actually shrink your prostate, but they come with significant risks, one of which is a lower libido from the lower testosterone. You can find natural tips for prostate health here.

4. Baldness Drug Propecia

Propecia is a similar drug to Proscar, but typically used at a lower dose to prevent hair loss in men. The drug works by reducing DHT, the most potent male hormone that is linked to shrinking hair, by blocking the enzyme 5-alpha reductase. It has been linked to not only a decreased interest in sex but also to full blown impotence.

BBC News followed one story of a 26-year-old who took Propecia for male pattern baldness. He stopped taking the drug when he noticed a decreased interest in sex, then a few weeks later became impotent. Even after six months of testosterone therapy his sexual health had not been restored, and his physician suggested a penile implant as a solution. Many men have found that the sexual side effects do not go away once the drug is stopped.

5. Antihistamines

Antihistamines, particularly Benadryl and Chlor-Trimeton, are also linked to a temporary loss of libido. Once the medication is cleared from your body your sex drive should go back to normal, but if you take these medications often, such as for allergy treatment, it could pose a longer-term problem for your sex life.

6. Medical Marijuana

Medical marijuana is legal in 20 states, where it is commonly used to treat pain, nausea, and other conditions. It may dampen your libido and ability to perform in men.

7. Anti-Seizure Drugs

Carbamazepine (Tegretol) is commonly used to prevent seizures, which it does by preventing impulses from traveling along nerve cells. Because it dampens nerve impulses, it may also reduce pleasurable sensations derived from sexual contact. Reduced sexual desire is common among Tegretol users. One study found, for instance, that epileptic men taking carbamazepine had change in hormonal levels, altered semen quality, increased erectile dysfunction, and reduced frequency of sexual intercourse.

8. Opioids

Widely prescribed opioid painkillers (Vicodin, Oxycontin, Percocet, etc.) have been making headlines for their addictive potential, but they also lower testosterone levels, which may in turn lower your libido.

9. Beta Blockers

Tens of millions of Americans take beta blockers to lower their blood pressure, and these medications, too, may decrease libido. Even eye drops containing the beta blocker Timolol (for the treatment of glaucoma) may impact your sex drive. In the vast majority of cases, drugs are not needed to reverse hypertension.

10. Benzodiazepines

There is evidence to suggest that anti-anxiety drugs like Xanax negatively affect sexual functioning, including lowering your sex drive.

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I am 50 and Divorced. Now What?

ivorce is an extremely trying time for men. If you are experiencing emotional upset, you have to know that this is to be expected. Many men begin to feel depressed after they lose their life partners and daily access to their children. A divorce just happens to be high on the list of reasons that men in your age group decide to commit suicide.

The above-described scenario does not have to be your story. You have many resources to draw upon that can keep you from falling into a mountain of depression, and they are your friends and family, support groups and counselors.

Take Advantage of Friends and Family

Your friends and family are excellent support systems when you are travelling through difficult waters. They can ensure that you are not wallowing in self-pity. You may begin to exercise questionable judgment at this time, but your friends and family are the ones to bring these issues to your attention and lead you in the right direction.

Join a Support Group

Divorcing men have many options when they are seeking a support group. One example is an organization in the Washington D.C. area that helps people move through their divorces in every stage. You can join whether you are just thinking about divorcing, in the process of divorcing or learning how to live after a divorce. This group’s members help each other with legal challenges, co-parenting and the emotional side of divorce to ensure that you do not have to experience anything on your own.

If you would like to meet with your support group in person, you can find this type of operation in your local area. In this new technological age, you can join an online group that can be just as supportive as a local group can be. Some groups even offer you the option of meeting via teleconference.

Enter Counseling

A support group may not be to your liking. In that case, divorce therapy may be a better choice for you. Divorce therapy is conducted on an individual basis and is directly related to the specific problems of divorce. In this type of counseling, you will be able to discuss how the divorce is making you feel, and your therapist will be someone who will guide you through in the way that is right for you.

Divorce therapy is also instrumental in helping you start your new life. You will learn what contributed to your divorce, so this therapy will help you correct mistakes you made in the past and aid in personal growth. Therefore, you will be a healthier person because of divorce therapy. So, when you are ready to date again, you will be prepared for it.

Begin to Date Again

Dating can be a real challenge if the divorce wasn’t your idea. You may have thought that you would be married forever, so you are completely unprepared for the prospect of dating at the age of 50. In addition, the thought of spending your evenings in a bar like you did when you were in your 20s may be extremely distasteful to you. Don’t worry. This is no longer a requirement.

Women in their 50s are thinking the same thing you are. They prefer not to spend their evenings in bars, but they do want to meet men. Consequently, you can meet women your age in many other places, including the following:

• Book clubs
• Dance classes
• Art classes
• Cooking classes
• Hiking groups
• The golf course

If you are a little scared to enter the dating scene again, you can relax because you will find that dating is much easier now. You have a lot to brag about these days that you didn’t have when you were younger. You are established in a great career, and this has given you confidence you didn’t have in the past. You can read women much better than you used to, so you will know when someone is truly interested in you. You will be surprised how easy it is to approach these women and strike up a conversation.

Date Online

You may still be a little wary of dating, so you might wish to take things at a slower pace before you meet someone in person. The Internet makes this possible with several online dating websites. Research shows that 40 percent of online daters are over age 50, so you have plenty of company.

How to Date

You know how devastating divorce can be, so you do not want to experience a second one. The reality is that the divorce rate for people in their 50s is twice that of younger age groups. For this reason, you will need to proceed with caution.

Dating in your 50s is different from dating in your 20s. You and your prospective partners have significant histories to sort through, and you can expect this to take longer than it does for younger people. Be prepared to spend this extra time so that neither one of you is unpleasantly surprised by anything in the future.

Remember that you have plenty of time and that there are a lot of women who will be interested in you. Don’t be afraid to be friends with them. As was described above, it benefits you to get to know these women very well before you enter into a romantic relationship. If it turns out that you are incompatible in a romantic sense, you can keep these women as friends.

“I Know You’re Having an Affair!”

magine this scenario: One day, your wife or girlfriend accuses you of having an affair. She sounds angry, pained, and certain. However, you’ve been completely faithful to her. Thus, you now feel hurt and frustrated, and perhaps you’re a little afraid of what’s going to happen next. And what could have caused your partner to lash out at you like this? Well, here’s one shocking possibility: Your significant other is leveling this accusation because she’s the one who’s been cheating.

That situation might sound far-fetched, but it’s somewhat common; both men and women occasionally rely on this ploy. Maybe your wife or girlfriend is only thinking about having an affair right now, or perhaps she’s involved in a physical liaison. Or she might be carrying on an emotional affair. An emotional affair is when two people spend as much time together as they can and even tell each other secrets that they keep from their spouses. But they don’t engage in sexual activity.

Now, if your significant other is cheating on you or planning to cheat on you, there are a few potential reasons why she’d accuse you of doing so. She might think that you won’t suspect her of an affair if she makes this charge against you first. Further, she could assume that you’ll spend so much energy defending yourself that you’ll be blind to the evidence of her infidelity.

Alternately, your partner might hope that you have in fact been unfaithful and that you’ll admit it. That way, her own cheating won’t bother her conscience as much. Indeed, if you were to later catch her with her lover, she could argue that she was merely seeking retribution. Or maybe she imagines that once you own up to an affair, she can suggest an open relationship — one in which you can both pursue romantic entanglements without feeling guilty.

Of course, if your partner wrongly contends that you’re having an affair, it doesn’t necessarily mean that she’s been unfaithful. Perhaps it’s an honest mistake. And if you immediately accuse her of cheating without any evidence, you might look even more suspicious. Therefore, the way that you handle yourself when she makes this charge is crucial.

First, take a deep breath, and remind yourself that you’ll survive this ordeal no matter what happens. Above all, refrain from getting angry even if you feel that you have every right to be furious. Also, don’t come across as overly defensive, and don’t protest too vehemently. In short, summon all of the self-restraint that you can.

Once your partner lets you speak, look her in the eyes and calmly tell her that you’re not cheating on her and never have. Ask her the all-important question next: “Why do you think that I’m having an affair?” If she provides you with a list of evidence, explain away those items in a reassuring and confident manner. For example, maybe she overheard your phone call the previous evening — an innocent conversation that you were having with a female colleague — and she got the wrong impression. Perhaps she saw you having lunch with a strange woman at a downtown cafe, and it turns out that you were conducting an out-of-the-office job interview.

If your girlfriend or wife was genuinely concerned that you were seeing someone else, she’s likely to feel relieved at this point as well as ashamed about the claims that she made. You might want to comfort her, or you might want to express annoyance since she called your integrity into question. Just don’t stay mad for too long. After all, if she didn’t care so much about you, the notion of your cheating on her wouldn’t upset her so much.

However, it’s conceivable that your partner has no rational explanation for saying that you’ve been untrue. In that case, it’s likely that she’ll be surprised by your controlled demeanor and your request for clarification; she was probably expecting you to fly into a rage or an incoherent fit of denials. Moreover, realizing that her attempts at manipulation have failed and that she’s been cornered, she might become more agitated. She could even launch into name-calling and personal attacks. When you’re able to get a word in, you should ask her in an even tone: “Are you accusing me of cheating because that’s what you’re doing?” Watch her reaction carefully. If she turns white or looks rattled, you may have just solved the mystery.

If you find yourself under these latter circumstances, it might be time to end the relationship. You don’t deserve to be with someone who’s capable of such duplicity or a person who’d accuse you of infidelity for no reason. Obviously, it can be scary to leave someone and to reenter the world of dating, but you should remind yourself that you’re worthy of respect and true love.

Why Didn’t My Dad Tell Me that Women are Looking for Security before Sex

ike many people, you may struggle to put yourself in others’ shoes. This isn’t always a big deal, but it can have major repercussions for your love life. Unfortunately, many men are unable to put themselves in women’s minds and end up projecting their own wants and needs onto their wives and girlfriends. Not surprisingly, this often results in one failed relationship after another. In some cases, it can prevent you from finding love in the first place. Even as a middle-aged guy, you may still struggle to understand what women want. So, what is it? The answer may surprise you.

What Men Want

The first thing to do when trying to understand what women want is to think about what men typically want. Chances are that you’re taking those wants, needs and desires and assuming that women think similarly. Here’s a pro tip: They don’t. At the risk of lumping all men into one group, most guys are primarily interested in companionship. Does that mean they place a priority on sex? Sure, that’s often the case, but there’s usually more to it than that. That’s especially true with older men because they’ve usually sown their wild oats years earlier and have settled down quite a bit.

So, men are mostly concerned with finding women who can provide companionship, and that companionship can take many forms. Another thing that many guys look for in female companions is to be cared for, or even mothered. Most men won’t readily admit to this, but they often want women who can help them keep their lives in order. Now, if you were to say this to the average woman, she wouldn’t be too thrilled. Still, it’s often the case, and there’s nothing inherently wrong with that.

What Women Want

What we’ve learned so far is that men mostly want companionship and to be mothered to a certain extent. That tends to become truer the older they get. Don’t women want the same things? Not quite. They want companionship, for sure, but they can just as easily get that from other loved ones and good friends. Sex is on their radars, of course, but it tends to appear fairly low on the list of priorities. While there are certainly women who want guys who will act like fathers to them, most women aren’t looking for father figures.

If women aren’t too worried about companionship and rarely look for fatherly guys, what exactly do they want? It can be summed up with one, simple word: security. Women want to be with guys who can take care of business. Men who have their affairs in order are immensely appealing to most mature women. The word “mature” is an important qualifier here. Younger women are usually less worried about the trappings of success and security because they figure they have plenty of time left. As women get older, though, finding a man who can give them the security they crave becomes more and more important.

Are You Going About Things the Wrong Way?

Like many men, you may feel like you’re competing with other guys who may be better lovers than you. In turn, you may feel the urge to emphasize how great you are in bed and the excitement you can bring to a woman’s life. If you’re doing these kinds of things, chances are that you’re striking out left and right. Women want and enjoy sex, of course, but it’s not like they struggle to find it. Most women can find men to sleep with them without any trouble, and that’s something many guys fail to consider.

If sex is so readily available to most women, it’s not something they are extremely concerned about when looking for serious partners. That’s one of the many reasons that security becomes so crucial. Do you demonstrate your ability to provide security to the women you date? This doesn’t mean you have to go around flashing cash and being flashy. It simply means emphasizing that you have your act together and are stable in the most important ways. For instance, do you own a house and a car? Are you gainfully employed? Do you have disposable income that you can spend on hobbies, travel and other fun things?

Shift Your Mindset to Improve Your Odds of Dating Success

Now that you know how important it is to show women that you can provide security and stability, you may be tempted to run around bragging about your many accomplishments. Don’t do that. Regardless of how successful and secure you are, no one likes braggarts. Boasting about the things you have and the security you can provide will make you seem insecure. The thing to keep in mind is that showing is far better than telling.

How do you show women that you have the security they crave? First, make sure you are presenting the right image. No, you don’t have to look like George Clooney to make this happen. In fact, you don’t have to be conventionally attractive at all. What you need to do is invest in nice, flattering clothes and get a decent haircut. Maintain your personal appearance as impeccably as you can, and splurge on a few really nice pairs of shoes. Keep your home and car neat and tidy, and make a point of showing that you’re a hard, dedicated worker.

Security First, Sex and Fun Second

At this point, you may be feeling pretty let down. After all, dating is still supposed to be fun, right? If you’re supposed to focus on providing security, how are you supposed to have a good time? Like many things, the rewards of playing your cards right from the beginning will come later. As women realize that you are a good provider and reliable person, you will attract more of them. Showing that you’re a stable, secure person is a major aphrodisiac for many women, so you will be able to enjoy plenty of excitement and fun as time goes by. Hang in there for now, and great things are sure to come your way later.

How Do You Demonstrate You Have Great Value to Your Employer When You’re Over Fifty

magine the following scenario: You are relaxing in your gym’s hot tub after a long, exhausting day of job-hunting. As you let the jets of hot water gradually relax the kinks in your neck and back, you look around at the other two guys who just happen to be sharing the space with you. Shocked, amazed and not just a little star-struck, you recognize them as two of the most renowned athletes of our time: Peyton Manning and Michael Jordan. How could these sports luminaries be hanging out in your humble little health club, you wonder. Then you notice that both men are looking right at you.

“We’re here to share some important things with you,” Michael Jordan explains. “Don’t ask us how, but we heard you were having a tough time and figured you could use some encouragement.”

Peyton Manning chimes in, “You might find this a little hard to believe, but the three of us have a lot in common. We’re all older guys, not past our prime yet but definitely not in our youth either. In both our cases, people have thought that we were over the hill and should just hang up our spikes, so to speak. We’re both living proof that youth isn’t always better and that maturity can sometimes actually be an advantage.” What could these multi-millionaires have in common with you, you ask.

Michael is the first to volunteer a pearl of wisdom. “Remember when I retired from basketball? I just couldn’t see myself playing shuffleboard or spending my life watching highlight videos. So what did I do? I tried other things, like professional golf, minor league baseball and even owning my own team.” Michael goes on to tell you that just as he cast his net wide, you can, too. You can take many of the skills and experiences you gleaned from past jobs and transfer them to new career opportunities. Think of it as redirecting, not reinventing your abilities.

“One thing that was indispensable for me was forcing myself to network,” Peyton volunteers. You realize that he’s not talking about those often trite and cheesy mixer parties; no, he means using the contacts and connections you have gathered through a lifetime of experience to help you at a time when you’re feeling adrift. After an injury that most thought had totally ended his career, Peyton didn’t lie down and die. Instead, he pushed himself almost beyond endurance, didn’t allow himself to lose faith that he would succeed and garnered support from his family, friends and fellow football players who truly believed in him. We all know the result: one of the most amazing come-backs in NFL history. In your case, networking means renewing old alliances, getting cozy with technology such as LinkedIn and not being afraid to ask for help. Whether it’s through an old college buddy or an unemployment support group, help—and eventual employment success—can come from unexpected sources.

“Think of this as a time when you can do a total reboot,” Michael says, smiling a bit guiltily at the tech pun. What he means is that when you have finished the routine tasks of your daily job search, take an hour or two to hone a skill or learn a new one. Not sure how to use a Mac? Never quite understood the ins and outs of Twitter? Always wondered how to do basic html? Well, there’s no time like the present to add a few new items to your tool kit.

“It’s all about your attitude and how you present yourself,” Peyton adds. While getting depressed or down is nothing to be ashamed of, don’t let it consume you. Instead, re-brand your age by turning maturity into an asset instead of a liability. Strut your stuff by articulating over and over until you believe it that your years of experience have molded you into being a creative, flexible thinker. When problems arise, you use your impressive archive of life lessons to arrive at a solution that a younger worker wouldn’t even know existed. Once you are convinced of the truth of age’s benefits, be sure that your resume reflects it. A resume is much more than a list of skills; the best ones chronicle a person’s tangible achievements. And that’s where an older worker can truly shine.

“I know what you’re thinking,” Michael cuts in. ‘Nobody wants to hire me because I have too much experience. I’m just plain over-qualified. Well, I can tell you something about that. Going from five-time MVP to minor league ballplayer was quite a leap. Who was going to take me seriously?” To avoid failing because of this trap, Michael advises that you focus on the moment. Emphasize the strong points that you see in your prospective employer; let your interviewer know that you want to join an organization whose philosophy and goals gel so perfectly with yours. Tell the person that you would be delighted to put your experience and skills toward realizing the company’s vision. If they don’t bite after that amazing sell, it’s their loss.

“Do you have any other tips for me?” you ask after noticing that Michael and Peyton are reaching for their towels and preparing to leave the hot tub.”

“If we had to sum it up in one sentence,” Peyton answers, “it would probably be this: Get support from positive people, list your talents, rebrand your age, find out what you don’t know, fill in the gaps and toot your own horn.“

“I couldn’t have said it better myself,” Michael agrees as he claps you on the shoulder with one of his huge hands. “Good luck, buddy. We have faith in you.”

Of course, this conversation never took place. In fact, chances are quite good that you will never share a hot tub with these world-famous celebrities. Yet, there is nothing false about their advice. Think about it, take it and use it. Before long, you too may see how you can overcome what you thought was an insurmountable barrier. Remember this: you may be over fifty, but you’re still in the game. All you need to do is take a run at the ball.