7 Things Men should Know after the Divorce

7 Things Men should Know after the Divorce

hen life throws you a curve ball, the sensible option is to keep on playing like the pros always do. Life-changing events such as divorce, the breakup of a long-term relationship or the death of a partner may throw you for a loop. No matter the cause of the schism, starting over can be disconcerting especially if you can’t even find the TV remote on your own.

1. Gather the Basic Paperwork

To get started on establishing your new routine as a newly-single man, you will need to have a handle on the basic papers attesting to your single-hood. Obtain copies of the divorce decree or the death certificate, whichever is applicable in your case. When applying for certified copies, make sure to include extra sets in your request as financial institutions will require copies for their files to support any changes requested on your account.

2. Where is that Checkbook?

Typically, couples would have a household account for paying and tracking bills and other household expenses. Quite often, one partner takes charge of bookeeping and household management with the other contributing financially but without major administrative input. All is well until the day the relationship is severed.

Post-divorce, the matter of checking accounts and bills would have been neatly addressed by your divorce decree. Accounts are listed, examined, adjudicated and closed according to your agreement. There is no errant checkbook to speak of – only a clean parting of ways.

However, with the death of a partner, your routine is upended especially if the event was unexpected and your partner left few clues regarding the practical details of household budgets and maintenance. Finding the checkbook and ledger pertaining to this account would be the logical first step in your financial housekeeping. Locate online files that may refer to this account and review the pattern of expenses as this will indicate the bills that should be paid regularly to ensure that your household will keep on running smoothly. In most states, survivors have 30 to 60 days to use a joint account to settle the estate. After the grace period, you will be asked to open a new account in your name.

3. Who to Pay to Keep the Lights On

Before the Internet became so prevalent, all it took to organize bill payments was to go through the mail, and line up billing statements. With online access, you may need to recover or recreate a list of accounts and regularly scheduled payments that may include include rent or mortgage, phone, cable payments and utility services covering electricity, water and sewer bills.

If your partner has been making online instead of mail-in payments, knowing the passwords would help tremendously. If you do not know the account passwords, contact the respective companies to explain your life-changing event and get them to update the account.

4. A new Budget for a new Lifestyle

Often, the partner handling the household books was doing the job so efficiently that you were never bothered with mundane matters such as keeping track of expenses, paying bills on time and avoiding costly penalties for missed or late payments. Since your life situation has changed, your expenses will vary. Create a budget reflective of your current circumstances.

5. Insurance Coverage and Payouts

If you are the beneficiary of insurance payouts, you have to contact the insurance companies and file the papers according to their guidelines. If minor children are in the equation, you will also have to take charge of filing those papers. Aside from life insurance policies, health insurance coverage will also be an issue especially if the deceased partner was the primary insured. Fortunately, most insurance policies will provide continuing coverage for survivors subject to restructured premium payments.

Insurance policies are often a major sticking point in divorce proceedings, so these issues are clarified as the divorce is finalized. Review your insurance coverage and adjust as you see fit based on your new lifestyle.

When insurance details are not clear cut after the death of a spouse or partner, examine the bank and credit card statements closely to look for payments made to insurance carriers.

6. Your Life on a Spreadsheet

After a monumental change in your life situation, it is important to have a clear idea of where you stand financially. A spreadsheet showing your assets and liabilities would be a good start. Rough out a list of what you have and what you owe, marking up items that may need further research. Refine this list as you go about finalizing the divorce or closing the estate. This spreadsheet will become the basis of making new goals, reinventing your life and planning for retirement.

7. Hire a Financial Planner

Disassociating yourself from a long term relationship is fraught with complications. You will need to close old accounts and establish new ones in your name only. You may need to change beneficiaries on existing insurance policies. Any financial recompense must be optimized for the benefit of your remaining household.

A qualified financial planner specializing in estate planning for people emerging from a divorce or recently widowed may help to redefine your goals and keep you on track. Embrace your new status, and keep on moving forward.